Thursday, May 27, 2010

One Year Later: Still Mad as Hell

Clinic was pretty tame on Tuesday, which is convenient for me because I don't want to blog about clinic today. I want to blog about Dr. Tiller's death.

It has been (almost) a year since Dr. Tiller was shot in the head, in his church in Kansas. I didn't know him personally so I can only speak to how I feel as a person who has lost a hero and a leader of the pro-choice movement. His death is not a personal loss to me so much as it is a symbolic one, and I hope that it does not offend anyone for me to address it in this way.

I don't have a lot of experience with loss, but I do know that there is a big difference when someone goes before their time. A friend of mine took his own life three years ago. While I did love him and consider him a friend, we weren't particularly close and didn't hang out a lot. And yet, I still feel that loss every day. Literally every single day, for three years, I have thought of him. His suicide is an open wound for me, and I imagine for others who loved him. I don't feel the same way about his death as I do about, for example, my 95-year-old grandmother, who passed much more recently. For both I am sad, but for Nathan I am also angry.

So when I went back in my blog to find my reaction to Dr. Tiller's murder, I was not surprised to see that it was overwhelmingly angry. I am still angry. My entire professional life is changed by his murder; every security decision we make is seen through the lens of what happened to George Tiller. I feel that will be the case for a long time. But also on a personal level, I am deeply angry about his premature death. His MURDER. I think about it all the time.

I have already written my thoughts for Abortion Gang and I will let you know when my post goes up. There will be reflections from the whole gang about Dr. Tiller's murder this weekend, so make sure you check it out (if you're interested). I just wanted to say, over here at my own blog, that the loss of Dr. Tiller continues to affect everyone who works in reproductive health care and especially abortion services. No one should have to fear for their life because of the choice they have made to help women in need. When I think about our doctor, it makes me so angry to think that someone would want to harm her. She is a warm and lovely person who has sacrificed A LOT to perform abortions, to help women.

I still get scared. When I think about how much was spent on keeping George Tiller safe, the fact that he was shot in his church...it makes me feel hopeless. I read Susan Wicklund's book, This Common Secret (highly recommended), and there is one part where a fellow provider explains to her that he no longer wears a bulletproof vest to work, because "they know to shoot for the head". And they did. We live in a world where people who want women to be able to make decisions about their own bodies GET SHOT IN THE HEAD. Are we so afraid of women's freedom?

This is all feelings, no flow. Sorry. If you are thinking about Dr. Tiller and you have a couple bucks, you can donate to the George Tiller Memorial Abortion Fund, or if you are looking to help out women here in Canada there is always the Morgentaler Defense Fund. We will keep fighting, friends.

If you are about to comment to tell me that maybe I shouldn't be so angry, please stop, reconsider, check your privilege, and then go fuck yourself. Thanks.

34 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah his left was taken from him to early, jus like all the babies he killed. All were murdered in cold blood. I hope that muderer will rot in hell. I'm all for pro choice,whenit comes to urself, but u cant choose for another person, no matter if they're livin in u or not. abortion is murder, no matter how u put it. more women regret their abortion then those who dont.

The Pedgehog said...

You just couldn't leave it alone, could you? You fuckers can't even just back off for one post, just let us have our grief.

Also: "more women regret their abortion then those who dont."

Um, citation please?

Edward said...

Don't sweat it, Pedge. Just another devastatingly articulate representative of the Pro Life movement...

Annie D said...

I understand your anger, and you are more than entitled to that. In the eyes of anti-choicers Dr. Tiller killed babies. In the eyes of the women whose abortions he performed he is a life saver. It is easy to pass judgment when you've never been faced with the decision.

And if you would be interested, I would love to write a guest post for you, which might help prove that anonymous poster wrong.

Anonymous said...

Fuck you Ed...just because you're a law grad you think you're holier than thou? Perhaps he/she was rushing through a post....did you ever consider that? I think Pedge can fight her own battles without her big bad boyfriend coming to the rescue. You're a pompass ass!

The Pedgehog said...

Wow Anon. Don't hold back.

Edward said...

Ooooooooh! Struck a nerve?

freewomansholyinheritance said...

Shouldn't have even been rushing through one, in the first place, Anon. Really, they can't read first before posting. Check. Your. Privilege. The poster did NOT and that would underSTANdably make ANYone angry. If you or the other anon can't accept that, then you shouldn't be posting, AT ALL. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Not really...I just like subtly decreasing the highly inflated egos of people who think they are so superlatively intelligent that they have never, in comparison to EVERY OTHER HUMAN BEING, made a spelling or grammatical error. You see, from your pictures, you strike me as an overweight, small-pricked, excuse for a man who feels the urge to defend his over-the-top feminist girlfriend during each and every post from an anti. Get a fuckin life and, more importantly, a self-esteem you coward!

The Pedgehog said...

Tsk tsk Ed, have you been posting pictures of your tiny prick online again?

The Pedgehog said...

Also, Anon, I enjoy that you think you're being "subtle".

Anonymous said...

Hey freewoman'sholyinheritance why don't you work on creating a better computer identity. It sounds ridiculous and, of greater importance, it hurts my hands to type out the whole thing! Second learn to follow up a question with a question mark k princess? If you're going to be the grammar police you better write yourself a fuckin ticket. I expect that those who point fingers at grammatical errors would use a fine-toothed comb on their follow-up arguments. Finally I can post whenever and whatever the fuck I want to. If you're so big on woman's rights then here's mine bozo!

Anonymous said...

Oh pedge....you ain't seen nothin' yet. I'm just getting warmed up. I find it funny that you stand by a guy who doesn't have a mind of his own and follows your every opinion and idea. If he wants to blog so much why doesn't he create his own instead of verbally defecating all over yours?

Anonymous said...

P.S. I've never met a plump guy with a big one....just sayin'. Usually guys with big pricks aren't so angry at the world.....some things just don't need a caption to display the truth.

Anonymous said...

And, further, they usually aren't this gynecologically obsessed. Women's issues, as choicers like to reverberate, are a WOMAN'S business. Translation: post somewhere else ED.....no one cares about a man's perspective in these parts.

The Pedgehog said...

"If he wants to blog so much why doesn't he create his own instead of verbally defecating all over yours?"

Something about a pot and a kettle...what is it...

"post somewhere else ED.....no one cares about a man's perspective in these parts."

Yeah Ed. And all you other men. What's your problem, trying to be allies? What do you think you are, half-decent human beings or something?

Anonymous said...

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah but once men are on the other side of the fence whoa!!! They are like the most scum-sucking, women-bashing, misogynistic beings on the fuckin planet. You guys should write a fuckin novel about the top ways to deceive people and twist the truth to benefit your hideous regime.....fuckin typical....just typical. I guess once someone who has a penis, albeit a rather misniscule one, represents your argument he automatically becomes the spokesperson for your site. Again hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha what a load of fuckin crap!

The Pedgehog said...

I don't think you understand feminism...but let me try to help. Men =/= bad
Male privilege = bad
Men who obstruct women's rights = bad
Women who obstruct women's rights = bad
People of any gender who fight for women's rights = activists and allies = good

Is that clearer?

Anonymous said...

question for you Pedge....and for all feminists.... if we're so well-equipped in the world and so readily adept and capable in all that we do why, then, do you choose to be with any man.....surely it can't be for procreation could it? Bwahahaha! So men ARE useful you say? But only insofar as they can donate sperm for a child whenever YOU CHOOSE for this to happen or to march on the behalf of women's rights. Am I getting this correct? I'm sure ED will be only to happy to be your sperm donor in the future and your spineless activist...I mean that IS all he's good for right?

The Pedgehog said...

I'm just trying to figure out how you misread my explanation of feminism so completely.

The Pedgehog said...

Let me try again.

We inhabit a society that gives men undeserved privilege. Having privilege does not make someone a bad person. I have lots of privilege but still I am, I think, a relatively good person and someone deserving of love. This also applies to many people, some of whom are men.

Feminism =/= hating men or thinking they are worthless.

Feminism = thinking all people are worthy of respect and equal treatment regardless of gender identity, sex, race, age, etc. etc.

Does that make more sense?

Much as I think you are a silly troll, I don't want people to have a false understanding of feminism.

The Pedgehog said...

Also, someone's ability or inability to produce children (or their choice to do or not do so) should have no bearing on their value as a person worthy of love. So no, men's value does not lie in their sperm donating skills. At least in my opinion.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I get it, so your definition of feminism supersedes all opinions the world over? I promise you that Canadian society gives men little privilege and, it goes without saying, the unborn children none. I can assure you that, in developed countries, women have most of the rights. Why, thanks to feminism, I can count my lucky chickens that I get to have a full-time job, take care of kids, have a high-paying career, drive a car that is as saavy as a man's, lose my baby weight in 3 weeks so I can still look fabulous while doing the aforementioned, and come home to clean up my house because my husband, who reckons I can do it all leaves the house a mess for me. Then, after striving for the career that a man has, by forty I'll want to start the family I've put off for 20 years and so the cycle begins again. Thanks feminism but I'd rather be sitting at home minding my children while all you other freaks strive to live up to the bar that the wonderful feminists have set up for us. I wonder how many women realize that men do not do 50% of the household upkeep. What a fuckin lie you feminazis have created. Try reading some articles about how feminism has royally fucked up society and, mostly, womanhood in general. Why don't you have a look around and see how many women are so fuckin depressed because they can't live up to the feministic agenda that you freaks dreamed up?

The Pedgehog said...

But...these are all things feminism has fought AGAINST. Feminism fights for accessible childcare, shared housework and equality within relationships, and against the capitalist system that requires two working parents to essentially be wage slaves if they hope to reasonably raise a family. Feminism fights for you to have the CHOICE to work or stay at home, and a real feminist will support your choice.

These problems are all products of the patriarchal, capitalist system we live in. Body image issues, underemployment, insufficient/unaffordable daycare/childcare, lack of support for working mothers, the "second shift" of housework - these are all things that feminism stands against.

Think about this: who benefits from you believing these problems are a result of feminism?

Also, if men have "little privilege" in Canadian society, explain to me...who has the privilege?

For more on privilege, I highly recommend this: http://www.case.edu/president/aaction/UnpackingTheKnapsack.pdf

The Pedgehog said...

Sorry it won't let me post the whole link. Just google "Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack" by Peggy McIntosh.

AL said...

Anonymous(es?*), this latest line of attack against Edward is one of the most hypocritical things I've read recently, but the assumptions that you have made are interesting and provide insight into your (IMHO, of course) fucked up perspectives on love, relationships, feminist men, self-interest, etc.†

It (the batch of ad hominem attacks) also shows that your primary interest is to get under Pedgehog's skin and not actually discuss anything. If this statement is incorrect and these are not your intentions, why not take the time to write a well thought out, well written, grammatically sound pseudo-editorial‡ that links to her blog post and provides your criticisms of Pedgehog's writing/specific ideas within her writing/your issues with feminism (and modernity?) in general and how you see Pedgehog as embodying them/etc. You could then post a comment here indicating the location of your post and that you'd like it if Pedgehog and/or her readership would read your response.

Now, to be less civil, you state that, "P.S. I've never met a plump guy with a big one....just sayin'..." This implies that you've fucked a lot of "plump" guys.§ Actually, if you take it literally, it states that you have fucked every "plump" guy that you have every met (or can by some other means reliably determine the size of every "plump" man's penis, but see previous footnote). I know that is probably not what you mean: I'm only pointing this out because I find it hilarious.‖
______________
*I really wish the Anonymous trolls would at least use the Name option on Blogger. It'd make it so much easier to follow their "arguments".
†Corollary: do you appreciate the works of Ayn Rand?
‡Prove that you are as/more intelligent as/than Peghog! Rub your sparkling prose in that grammar snob's face! (Apologies for the mixed metaphor).
§Or you can name some other situation that you've been in that required viewing erect penises (e.g. if you are a sex researcher of some kind).
‖I don't think that there is anything wrong/funny about fucking any number of "plump guy[s]" (or non-"guys") of any size, but I do think that it is funny that while attempting to say that, essentially, 'X person has a small dick!' you basically stated that you have sex with lots of "plump" men, which is so basic in its crudeness that it could be a 'your momma' joke (although, 'your momma has sex with lots of "plump" men' isn't exactly top shelf material).

Stevephanie said...

Anonymous, I just googled "plump guys with big dicks" and it looks like there are a lot of plump guys out there that you have not fucked/dick size checked.

Edward said...

Wow. Just wow. I leave the internet for a couple of hours to go to a movie and all hell breaks loose.

Anonymous, make up your mind. Am I pompous or do I have no self-esteem? Am I a "holier than thou" know-it-all, or do I "follow [Pedge's] every opinion and idea"? I'm too confused to be insulted.

Also, Pedge, I'm glad that you caught the unintentionally ironic use of the word "subtly." I had a satisfyingly pompous, holier than thou laugh over that.

"Try reading some articles about how feminism has royally fucked up society and, mostly, womanhood in general." Sorry friend, I don't subscribe to "Misguided Assholes Quarterly." Maybe if you link to the aforementioned articles, we can all be enlightened. Or not.

Since I don't read "Paranoid Unsubstantiated Statement Digest", would you be so kind as to explain to me what you mean when you suggest that "Canadian society gives men little privilege"? You point out that women can have jobs and drive cars. How does women working and driving diminish male privilege?

Additionally, you mention that you can "count your lucky chickens..." Kudos on the mixed metaphor. I'm sure it's going to catch on.

But, all fortunate poultry aside, Anonymous, if you thought that I was pompous before, you made a big mistake. After reading your feeble-minded drivel, I feel smarter than ever.

Anonymous said...

Wow! The shit hawks are out full force! Should have known the abortion gang would "gang" up on me. Al I'd love to address you first. You seem like your a wee bit desperate with all your penis talk. I was simply making a keen observation, and not from personal experience (cause I don't dig fat guys), that most men who are this insane about women's issues are a little light in the "testicular fortitude" department. It's kinda like guys who cry while watching "The Notebook". We say it's cute but, really, we're wondering why the fuck you are so moved by it? So Ed why are you so into women's rights if you aren't one? Steph if you had to google fat guys with huge penises you clearly need to get a life. Ahh and just what I was waiting for....my super intelligent friend Ed. Oh how you display such insight when you write your screed regarding "lucky chickens". Did ya ever think perhaps I wrote that on purpose because, just as chickens are NOT lucky, so are the women of today's society? You see chickens get to wait for their slaughter to end up on your robust meal table just as women of today's society get to look forward to a life of unequivocal hardship because of the feminist movement. Clearly this play on words was a little to advanced for you. Just a little thought to leave you with asshole....if I am as "feeble-minded" as you say I am then your "feeling smarter than ever" isn't setting the bar real high huh? Just a lil' perspective for ya!

The Pedgehog said...

Ok Anon, time to move on. Even though you came in here, ad hominems a-blazin' (including attacking someone's penis size, which is maybe the least mature thing I've ever seen on the internet), I tried to engage you on the one point you might be interested in discussing (feminism). But since you've proceeded to not only totally ignore my attempt at reasonable discussion, and have instead immediately derailed into more ad hominem attacks, I have to shut it down.

Any further comments on this thread by any anonymous commenters that don't contain reasonable and respectful attempts at discussion will not get through moderation.

Thanks for playing, but you only served to ruin it for everyone.

P.S. It was a clever attempt to get under my skin - going after someone you perceived to be close to me - but unfortunately for you we all have good self-esteem and a sense of humour. So...thanks for the larfs, sorry things didn't work out for you...?

The Pedgehog said...

Update: Anon commented once again especially for me, to tell me that my grieving for Dr. Tiller is weird and creepy because I didn't know him (which is something I thought I covered in the post, but ok...), and also that my blog is boring. Just so y'all know: still trying to bug me. Still not presenting a reasonable argument. You have to give them points for persistence.

Edward said...

Anonymous,

How could I be so blind as to miss your "clever" insight into the plight of poultry? Perhaps because it makes no sense. In order to be effective, a metaphor or simile needs to lead the reader. You have not done this, and the result is that your meaning was unclear (or, far more likely, you mixed your metaphors, and then scrambled to justify the error in order to save face.)

More importantly, I am "into women's rights" despite my maleness for the same reason that wealthy, socially-conscious politicians are passionate about the plight of those below the poverty line, or that healthy activists care about the welfare of persons with illnesses and disabilities--because I am empathetic. I perceive an inequality in the world that I find distasteful and I am unwilling to ignore it. If you can't appreciate that, I have nothing more to say to you.

AL said...

"Wow! The shit hawks are out [in] full force!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fwiXG0p3N6g

"Should have known the abortion gang would "gang" up on me."

You did know. This was your intention and why you've been so insulting.

"Al I'd love to address you first. You seem like your [sic] a wee bit desperate [sic] with all your penis talk."

I think that it is fair to pull a Freudian thing here, but you were the one that brought up penises, so I don't think you can attribute that to me.

"I was simply making a keen observation, and not from personal experience (cause I don't dig fat guys), that most men who are this insane about women's issues are a little light in the "testicular fortitude" department."

I think that it is a stretch to call that a "keen observation." And you've still provided no evidence of any kind, so it's more of "I was simply making a wild speculation" than anything. Also, how is Ed "insane" about women's issues? That he acknowledges that they exist? That he supports them?

"It's kinda like guys who cry while watching "The Notebook". We say it's cute but, really, we're wondering why the fuck you are so moved by it?"

Wait wait wait. So you can make sweeping generalizations about men crying while watching movies, but when Pedgehog tries to provide a general definition of feminism you're all "Oh, I get it, so your definition of feminism supersedes all opinions the world over?"

...

AL said...

...

"So Ed why are you so into women's rights if you aren't one?"

Why were non-black men and women interested in the abolition of slavery or the civil rights movement. Are you that self-interested?*

"Steph if you had to google fat guys with huge penises you clearly need to get a life."

You mean Stevephanie or Steve. And I don't think that you (or I - I'm needless interacting with an internet troll after all†)

"Ahh and just what I was waiting for....my super intelligent friend Ed. Oh how you display such insight when you write your screed regarding "lucky chickens". Did ya ever think perhaps I wrote that on purpose because, just as chickens are NOT lucky, so are the women of today's society?"

That's ludicrous. Why not just admit that you used a mixed metaphor? However, assuming that you are not lying and that was your intention, you're a bad writer. Good writing is about communicating meaning with other people. I doubt that anyone got this ridiculous ironic assignment of luckiness to chickens/women. No one is going to be able to follow that logic or catch that your use of lucky was ironic (try adding quotation marks, it helps). Although it is true that there are always subtexts and subtleties going on within a text, you are talking about your main point, and Ed/the reader is not responsible for deciphering what you mean; it's your job to write in a way that is easily decipherable. (If not, then lasngdfakjsngraoiengdfjnglkajdfnglkjahahaimsmarterthanyou!)

"You see chickens get to wait for their slaughter to end up on your robust meal table just as women of today's society get to look forward to a life of unequivocal hardship because of the feminist movement."

Pedge already dealt with this above. But I salute your ability to form an analogy. You still need to explain why feminism is bad for women (which would be an interesting debate between you and pedgehog. If you ever get tired of talking about dicks, maybe that'd be something to write a comment about. I don't think that you'd be successful in convincing me that feminism is bad for women, but I'd be interesting in reading your misperceptions and why you think that way).

"Clearly this play on words was a little to [sic] advanced for you."

What you wrote (again, generously‡ assuming that that this is not a silly post-hock addendum) was not anywhere near advanced, it was just confusing and poorly articulated. (I mean, one could argue that no "play on words" are really advanced, they're just clever. In fact puns--a common form of word play--are considered by some§ to be the lowest form of humour.)

"Just a little thought to leave you with asshole....if I am as "feeble-minded" as you say I am then your "feeling smarter than ever" isn't setting the bar real high huh? Just a lil' perspective for ya!"

This is true. But intellectually crushing a smug and self satisfied person always seems to bolster one's self esteem. It's more about the level of smugness/their perceived intelligence rather than their actual intelligence.
_____________
*Again, corollary: do you appreciate the works of Ayn Rand?
†I consider it a form of creative writing exercise.
‡IMHO
§Samuel Johnson?